House M.D.
From UnknowableWiki
House, M.D. is a television show broadcasted at Fox. Its protagonist is Gregory House, the series' namesake, a grouchy and heavily sarcastic diagnostitian who's addicted to Vicodin.
Dr. House works at the Princeton-Plansboro Teaching Hospital as the head of a highly specialised Diagnostic Medicine Department. He has three underlings--Dr. Allison Cameron, Dr. Eric Foreman and Dr. Robert Chase, dubbed "Ducklings" by the fandom--with which he discusses the case of the week, usually by writing the patient's symptoms on his trademark whiteboard and dismissing the three doctors' often reasonable guesses with Sherlock-like deduction skills. He sometimes indulges them, which tends to put the patient closer to death than he or she was to begin with.
The case solution often comes to House in a purely accidental way, as an idea provoked by a casual conversation with someone--usually Dr. James Wilson, his best (and only) friend. It's a frequent gimmick of the show that patients and/or their families hide vital information from House, which he eventually deduces; hence his trademark tagline, "Everybody lies."
House's dislike of patients regarding them is weekly fueled by the hours he is obliged to spend at the hospital's clinic, treating ordinary cases that only confirm his incredulity regarding the general stupidity of the human race. Clinic patients, however, have given him ideas for the main case several times.
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House MD characters
- Gregory House
- is a nephrologist and an "infectious disease guy", but knows an absurd lot about other fields of Medicine (and many other random facts). He had an infarction in his thigh muscle a few years prior to the beginning of the series, and therefore has to walk with a cane. He gives off the impression of being embittered and arrogant, and he is both things. He is also a genius to whom solving cases seems to matter infinitely more than his patients' actual lives. House has, however, shown signs of humanity, and evidently cares for those around him (even though he seldom shows it). He once had a long-term relationship with Stacy Warner, and at the moment has (arguably) a crush on Allison Cameron. He drives a motorcycle, plays poker every Thursday with random people he picks off the street, loves videogames, General Hospital, and making bets concerning his patients' fates, lies and illnesses.
- Lisa Cuddy
- is the hospital administrator. She frequently clashes with House regarding almost every decision he makes, medical or otherwise, but tends to give in to his wishes after some arguing. She is often seen forcing House to do his required clinic hours. The visible amount of UST in their interaction has led many fans to believe that House and Cuddy have had some sort of relationship in the past, but nothing has been confirmed in the series so far.
- Allison Cameron
- is an immunologist. She is opposite to House in many ways, chiefly her extreme concern for patients and their physical and mental well-being. She once fell in love with and married a man who was dying from cancer. House claims that her desire to be needed fuels her romantic emotions more than anything; she falls for "damaged" people, men who, in her opinion, need to be "fixed" somehow. Cameron has a well-known crush on House, which, as he points out repeatedly, is Exhibit A of the statement above.
- Robert Chase
- is an intensivist. Chase was once a seminary boy who quit to go to Med School. He only got a job in PPTH's high-profile Diagnostic Medicine team because his father, who was a famous doctor, asked House to accept him. He has issues with his father, who abandoned the family and later left him out of his will.
- Eric Foreman
- is a neurologist. He's obsessive, arrogant and often clashes with House. The two are similar in many ways, with the exception that House tends to be right more often. They even wear the same tennis. Foreman was only hired because he has a criminal record; he's often sent to do illegal searches on patients' houses for possible environmental causes for the mystery ailments.
- James Wilson
- is Head of the Oncology Department and House's best friend. The two have a peculiar relationship: they fight quite often, but usually make up without ever discussing real problems. They get along well, despite the obvious difficulties of being a friend of someone like Gregory House (e.g. his barging in Wilson's office at any given time for whatever random reason, regardless of patients). There is a substantial amount of House/Wilson shippers in the fandom, arguably more than any other ship.
Recurring characters
- Stacy Warner
- also known by her Indian name of "the woman [House] used to live with", Stacy is a successful attorney that House met in a Doctors vs. Lawyers paintball match. She says that their first date wasn't very nice, but somehow she moved in a week later. They were together for five years, breaking up after he became a cripple and started to shut her out of his life. She later remarried, and their interaction is complicated.
- Brenda Previn
- "Evil Nurse Brenda", as she is often dubbed in the fandom, is the only nurse with whom viewers are acquainted. She often gets in the way of House's team, for whatever reasons.
- Michael Tritter
- is a detective who got angry when House patronised him during a clinic visit in his trademark style. Tritter, unlike most of House's patients, decided to not take this abuse lying down, and used his law enforcement resources to force House into a very complicated situation. He focused on House's addiction to Vicodin and threatened to put him in jail unless House went to rehab.
- Coma Guy
- is an unnamed guy in a coma with whom House often has lunch and watches daytime TV.
Quotes
Houseisms
- Gregory House: [to the crowd in the walk-in clinic's waiting area] Hello, sick people and their loved ones! In the interest of saving time and avoiding a lot of boring chitchat later, I'm Doctor Gregory House; you can call me "Greg." I'm one of three doctors staffing this clinic this morning.
- Lisa Cuddy: Short, sweet, grab a file.
- Gregory House: This ray of sunshine is Doctor Lisa Cuddy. Doctor Cuddy runs this whole hospital, so unfortunately she's much too busy to deal with you. I am a board...certified diagnostician with a double specialty in infectious disease and nephrology. I am also the only doctor currently employed at this clinic who is forced to be here against his will. [He turns to Cuddy] That is true, isn't it? [He turns back to the crowd.] But not to worry, because for most of you, this job could be done by a monkey with a bottle of Motrin. Speaking of which, if you're particularly annoying, you may see me reach for this: this is Vicodin. It's mine. You can't have any. And no, I do not have a pain management problem, I have a pain problem. But who knows? Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm too stoned to tell. So, who wants me? [Nobody moves.] And who would rather wait for one of the other two guys? [Everybody raises their hands.] Okay. Well, I'll be in Exam Room One if you change your mind.
- Son of a mute man: He can't talk.
- Gregory House: Excuse me?
- Son: He had a knee surgery.
- Gregory House: Right.
- Son: About a year ago. And then - he couldn't talk.
- Gregory House: Right. That happens, you know, it's pretty dangerous operating so close to the vocal cords.
- Gregory House: Go home. Talk to your daughter.
- Woman: What?
- Gregory House: Your pants, your blouse, your scarf are all freshly dry cleaned—everything except your jacket. It's got a smudge on it--probably two days old. Which means you didn't know the jacket had been worn. So, either your husband is a cross-dresser or your daughter's been borrowing your clothes without telling you. Probably wants to look older to get into bars.
- Woman: I don't have a daughter.
- Gregory House: [pause] Next!
- Allison Cameron: What happened to "everybody lies"?
- Gregory House: I was lying.
- Robert Chase: We've got an MRI scheduled in 20 minutes. It's the earliest Foreman could get the machine.
- Gregory House: I teach you to lie and cheat and steal... and as soon as my back is turned, you wait in line?
- Allison Cameron: Could pain medication cause an orgasm?
- Gregory House: I wish.
- Man: I assume you've been in love?
- Gregory House: Is that the one that makes your pants feel funny?
- Gregory House: Boyfriend sneaks in to get his freak on the night before the anaphylaxis. I don't buy that it's unrelated.
- Allison Cameron: He loves her, did everything he could to make sure she wouldn't get sick.
- Gregory House: What does that mean?
- Allison Cameron: Love is an emotion certain people experience, similar to happiness. No, wait, maybe I should give a more relatable example.
- Gregory House: Oh, snap!
- Gregory House: [on internet porn] Why do they bother putting age restrictions on these things when all you have to do is click "yes, I am 18"? Even a 17 year old can figure it out!
House and Wilson
- James Wilson: Nobody's perfect.
- Gregory House: Mother Theresa?
- James Wilson: Dead.
- Gregory House: Angelina Jolie?
- James Wilson: No medical degree.
- Gregory House: Now who's being picky?
- Stacy Warner: If Chase screwed up so badly, why didn't you fire him?
- Gregory House: He has great hair.
- Stacy Warner: What are you hiding?
- Gregory House: I'm gay. Oh! That's not what you meant. It explains a lot, though: no girlfriend, always with Wilson, obsession with sneakers...
- James Wilson: [examining House's leg MRI] House, this is God.
- Gregory House: Look, I'm a little busy right now. Not supposed to talk during these things. Got time Thursday?
- James Wilson: Let me check. Oh! I got a plague. What about Friday?
- Gregory House: You'll have to check with Cameron.
- James Wilson: Oh! Damn it! She always wants to know why bad things happen. Like I'm gonna come up with a new answer this time.
- James Wilson: Your real fear is me having a good relationship.
- Gregory House: Yes, it keeps me up at night. That and the Loch Ness Monster, global warming, evolution, other fictional concepts.
- James Wilson: That smugness of yours really is an attractive quality.
- Gregory House: It was either that or get my hair highlighted. Smugness is easier to maintain.
Ships
Canon
House's relationship with Stacy is mentioned many times throughout the series, and during season 2 they had a short continuation of it. After a short affair, Stacy returned to her husband and recent patient of House's, Mark Warner.
There is some hinting at a relationship between House and Cuddy (House, at least, constantly alludes to some form of a relationship), but there has been no romantic interaction between the two on-screen. However, House has had some with Dr. Cameron.
Cameron's crush encouraged her to ask him out on a date toward the end of the first season, which did not go well for either of them. During the third season, she kissed House to distract him while attempting to obtain a blood sample. It is not clear what the long-term repercussions of this were, but Cameron later became involved with Chase.
